Posts by troubled mind

I noticed the Witnesses put up a table at our local Wal-mart last summer ,and i have been thinking of asking the manager about putting up a cult awareness table too ! Let me know if you go through with it ....

27

Did you ever shun someone close? How did you feel?

by jean-luc picard in

jw
friends

how does a jw feel when he "has" to shun someone he likes/loves?.

during the time i was in, i shunned people.

but as i didn't like them, it was no problem.. but now, i'm trying to understand how my family might really feel.. (i presume here, of course, that they do "like/love me".).

troubled mind

Yes ,and it always made me feel horrible inside . I constantly battled with my own conscience telling me love of family should come first ,and Watchtower counsel saying if we really loved our Df'd loved one we should shun them .

I missed my brothers wedding because the 1980's (86-89) KM had just come out with the strong wording about shunning a family member that no longer lives in the home . I went back and forth speaking at least a little to him whenever we crossed paths ,but never intentionally planning association .We missed watching each others kids growing up . We had some contact over those years ,but not enough to build a strong familiar bond that families should have .

He was DA'd in the 1970's ......over the yrs it dawned on me the disfellowshipping policy made no sense in his case . It was meant to keep the congregation clean and to make the person feel sorry for the lost association so they would want to return . After 30 yrs the fact was my brother was a good kind person that just didn't want to be a JW so the reasoning behind the DF policy fell flat .

In 2000 my oldest son was graduating High School and i wanted my brothers family there . I called and invited them to the ceremony and to a small family gathering at my home afterwards . I was so excited and they were too . They even suggested they would come out early and be at the house to host until we got home from the ceremony . The night before the event my other brother (a recent baptized JW after yrs of being out ) called and said I had to uninvite my DA'd brother or else all the JW family and friends would have to be notified of his presence and would most likely not attend . He berated me and made me feel horrible .....he used the Watchtower magazine advice against me . I called my older brother in tears and explained the situation ,he calmly said don't worry about it ...I won't come .He was more worried that this would distract attention away from my son and it was better to just not attend .....

This event was the first major wake up call for me that I was brainwashed ......afterwards I knew I had made a huge mistake . With in a couple of months after this I made a final decision that never again would i allow anyone to tell me shun anyone again . I went to my older brother and apologized profusely over what I had done to him . I promised never to allow this to happen again . He forgave me and has given me another chance . We now are involved in each others lives along with each others children . My other brother attend a few 'all' family included gatherings ,but now that i quit attending meetings he has cut off all communication . So I gained one brother and lost the other .

I am sure your family feels the utter dispair shunning you causes their hearts to go through . Hopefully they will be smarted than I and not wait to long to wake up to the sheer nonsense of cutting off a loved one .

41

Do You Think You Would Be Terribly Missed If You Died?

by minimus in

jw
friends

lately, i have noticed that many suddenly have died or as it is usually expressed, died "unexpectedly" in the local obituaries.. i have come to know of many young people suddenly deciding to kill themselves for whatever reasons.

most that i have known about had either financial or personal issues and sadly, they just gave up.. i wonder if we were suddenly gone, would people take notice?.....

(and don't worry about me.

troubled mind

nope..........

40

Hi Friends! An Update! I'm a mommy now! :)

by Butterflyleia85 in

jw
friends

i know i havent been on here forever!

i still am very happy and researching and reading all i can to keep me from going back.. i want what is best for my baby boy, ian.

he is so precious to me!!.

troubled mind

Congratulations ,what sweet baby boy ! He is already smiling for the camera .

13

Hurt my back today gardening and I think the Chiropractor made it worse

by troubled mind in

i had been doing yard work all day and then i went to plant a rose bush for my dad .....when i stepped down on the shovel my lower back went out !

omg it hurt ....i couldn't straighten completely up afterwards .

so i went to see the chiro ,he used an activator on my back and now the pain is worse !

troubled mind

Thanks for all the responses ! The pain is getting a bit more tolerable . Icing seems to be helping.

I see my Physician Friday for a previous scheduled appointment so if things are not much better by then I will have him give me advice (drugs).

13

Hurt my back today gardening and I think the Chiropractor made it worse

by troubled mind in

i had been doing yard work all day and then i went to plant a rose bush for my dad .....when i stepped down on the shovel my lower back went out !

omg it hurt ....i couldn't straighten completely up afterwards .

so i went to see the chiro ,he used an activator on my back and now the pain is worse !

troubled mind

I had been doing yard work all day and then I went to plant a rose bush for my Dad .....When I stepped down on the shovel my lower back went out ! OMG it hurt ....I couldn't straighten completely up afterwards . So I went to see the Chiro ,he used an activator on my back and now the pain is worse ! I took a muscle relaxer and have been putting ice on the area ,but I just could not sleep . It feels better sitting up .....walking down the stairs from my bedroom brought me to tears ...

So now what should I do ? Wait it out or go see my regular Doctor tommorrow ......I don't think I want to see the Chiro again

Is it normal for it to hurt os much after an adjustment ? I have seen Chiro's in the past and it always has helped ,but this time I 'm not sure it was worth it .....

42

Big surprise for me

by mouthy in

two days ago!!!

a man i knew in england.his wife was a jw he wasnt.... i knew she had ran off with the elder..1999..was df so was the elder.. they were then reinstated -she divorced alan #1 !!!!

& married the elder another .

troubled mind

What an wonderful surprise for you Grace ! Thanks for sharing ,it warms the heart to hear when such nice things happen . Happy Birthday !

24

When did this forum go apostate?

by B_Deserter in

jw
friends

i was curious because i had heard simon was a jw when he started this forum.

i was looking through the old posts, but couldn't really pinpoint one that was a "turning point" so-to-speak.

simon must have left the j-dubs at some point.

troubled mind

WAIT .....WHAT.....THIS SITE IS APOSTATE ??????

22

Yugoslavia.

by Snowboarder in

jw
friends

yugoslavia is my country and always will be.

it was my motherland it represented peace, and a good future, family, joy.

when it fell apart so did the start of falling apart of my life.

troubled mind

Snowboarder ,I wish I could give you a big motherly hug . I read all your posts ,and think about what your going through , it saddens me deeply your life is and has not been your own . I wish you could have remained in the country you loved and developed a close relationship with your grandparents .

It is hard for you right now because your young and still dependent upon your parents . My best advice to you is to never lose your focus and desire . One day you WILL be able to pursue your own destiny .....patience ....it will happen for you .

Continue to vent your feelings here ...it is good to have a release .